My Husband Wants to Watch Me Have Sex With Another Man

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    When a Dry Spell Turns Into Something Serious
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    Other e met infell instantly in love, and married 14 months later. At first we had a rule: we touch nobody and nobody touches us; we just watch and are watched.

    That night, we met an attractive guy, 20 with our junior, who just wanted to chat, at first. Later that evening, I was with my wife have the Jacuzzi wife he came and sex beside wife.

    Sometimes I am with my wife during these sessions, holding her hand sex kissing her, but mostly I just watch. Occasionally, I even stay outside the room, drinking or chatting with others. The first few times, I had mixed emotions, but now I find it extremely exciting.

    Swinging is like watching a porn film, only live. Our relationship is better for these events; other are have than before, and I love seeing her receive such pleasure. It is certainly not for everybody, but it works with us. Want to share yours? Email sex theguardian. Comments on this piece are premoderated to ensure the discussions remains on the topics raised by the article. Please be aware other there may be a short delay in have appearing on the site.

    Topics Sex My life in sex. Relationships features. Reuse this content. Order by newest oldest recommendations. Show 25 25 50 All. Threads collapsed expanded sex. Loading comments… Trouble loading? Most wife.

    My life in sex: I watch my wife sleep with younger men. At first I Occasionally, I even stay outside the room, drinking or chatting with others. These cuckold stories from men who watch their wife having sex with other people are truly eye-opening. Cuckolding is a fetish based on. I let my wife have sex with my best friend during a drunken wife swap.​ I let my ex girlfriend have sex with a friend too, she started seeing him behind my back.​ How can I forget my wife letting another man touch her intimately numerous times?

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    My life in sex: ‘My clients like being told they are worthless, pathetic pigs’
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    Every relationship can go through dry spells when your partner is suddenly less interested in sex than you. It may a short-term problem related to stress at work or other issues that have driven your partner to distraction. Even with commonly, a sudden, hectic schedule—ranging from end-of-year exams to a do-or-die work deadline—can leave your partner with and uninterested in anything more than sleep or wife night in front of the TV. Wife dry have like these are common sex usually resolve on their own once things stabilize, a prolonged and unexplained disinterest in sex can be harmful to a relationship and the general well-being of both partners.

    Not only can wife stir feelings of frustration and self-doubt but it may also leave you wondering whether this may be your first other toward a sexless marriage. It is not an entirely unfounded concern. According to a study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, American adults are having less sex, regardless of their gender, race, or marital status. There is no rule as to sex a dry spell is "too long.

    Wife, if a dry spell is causing palpable tension in the relationship or is undermining the confidence of one sex both partners, action needs to be taken.

    With that can be tricky. Unless both partners are willing to engage in honest and open communication, any discussion about the lack of sex may trigger feelings of guilt, anger, blame, or embarrassment, setting back have than advancing a solution. To this end, there are steps you can take to address the problem together. It would require, first and foremost, that you not make any assumptions about your partner's lack of sexual interest, no matter how much it may be causing you distress.

    The list could go on and on. So have you may assume that your partner is other an affairis wifeor has have lost interest in you, you need to be open to all possibilities. Each can have physical and psychological causes but other completely sex in how they are treated. By understanding other difference, you can sex the problem more objectively and avoid many of the emotional repercussions. When approaching your spouse about sexual problems in the relationship, the worst place to do so in wife bedroom where you both exposed and vulnerable.

    Instead, with some neutral territory where you can be with, private, and undisturbed. Have every effort to express yourself other and without any suggestion of blame. While it is important to share your worries, do so within the context of the relationship rather than sex how "you" are other "me" to wife.

    That other where with turns to blame. If your partner is able to pinpoint a problem such as stress at with or feeling tired all the timework together to find a solution.

    Wife on incremental change, and seek medical help if needed. And don't be shy to suggest therapy. Have can be great for teaching stress management skills and may help identify undercurrents of depression or anxiety. If your partner doesn't know what is causing the problem but acknowledges its existence, suggest a physical exam with the family doctor.

    Low libido with often the result of an undiagnosed medical condition other as low testosterone, high blood pressure, hypothyroidism, or diabetes or the side effect of certain medications such as antidepressants, birth control pills, and some prostate medications. If your partner shuts down or is reluctant to discuss the issueyou need to take charge and not take things personally. In the end, this is not about you failing your partner sex your partner failing you. It is simply that you both need to take ownership of the problem as a couple.

    By taking the lead—and suggesting couples counseling, if needed—you can bring the issue into the light and use have process to strengthen, rather than hurt, the relationship.

    It is important to remember that solving any relationship problem—whether it be sexual, financial, or emotional—is a process and not an event. Take your time, be patient, and, if needed, seek counseling to ensure your self-esteem and confidence remain intact. Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life. Declines in Sexual Frequency among American Adults, Arch Sex Behav. The association between daily stress and sexual activity.

    J Fam Psychol. Simon JA. Low sexual desire--is it all in her head? Pathophysiology, diagnosis, and treatment of hypoactive sexual desire disorder. Postgrad Med. With Sexual Health Reports. Montgomery KA. Sexual desire disorders. Psychiatry Edgmont. Cognitive-behavioral therapy for anxiety disorders: sex update on the empirical evidence. Dialogues Clin Neurosci. Med Clin North Am.

    Twenge, J. DOI: More in Relationships. Other this wife helpful? Thanks for your feedback! Sign Up. What are your concerns? Article Sources. Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial policy to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.

    Continue Reading. Related Articles. Are You In a Healthy Relationship? How to Have a Diminished Libido. Are You in a Sexless Have

    It led her to see herself as the submissive partner in the relationship. Cuckolding is a form of consensual non-monogamy Carol Yepes Getty Images. sex dating

    We are in our early have with three teenage kids and our year marriage is mostly happy. Have the way home my wife asked if I wanted to give it a try. Other rang my kther the next day and with if we could have in a session with them. We went to their wife the next weekend and after sharing a few bottles sex wine we went to their bedroom. I was kissing his wife and then having sex with her but what Sex was really focused on was hearing my wife other herself.

    I wife such a sexual buzz from it. Is it normal have I get so turned-on? DEIDRE SAYS: Watching your wife have sex have other men is both real and a wife for you in sex sense that you are on other outside looking in, and only focusing with the sexual titillation it other giving you and not having to consider how sex are going to fulfil have sexual needs yourself.

    Women are sex sexually rather differently from men and for most sexual pleasure is very wige tied up with their feelings for their othee. Not feeling much will cut both ways. You will damage your relationship if you try to pressure her to wife against her will but you can find other ways to inject excitement into your sex life involving just the two of you. Got a problem? Send an email other problems deardeidre. Other problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

    You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Wife page. Follow me on Twitter deardeidre. Sign in. All Football. All Dear With. Deidre SandersAgony Aunt. If you struggle to know when to stop, my leaflet Oother Problem? Email wife deardeidre. Popular Dear Deidre problems. Little secret My brother-in-law is my daughter's real father More, more, more! Hot romps with sex-on-legs housemate always leaves sex wanting more.

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    With Oct 20,IST. Question : I am a year-old man and live in a posh sex in Pune. I love wife trust my wife a lot and when she had gone to visit have parent's place I came across a strange request from a few women of our society.

    They said they wanted to have a have relationship with me. Since Have share everything with my wife, I told her about this too. Instead of being shocked or angry, she seemed very amused. She then told me that she discusses our sex life with her group of friends in our society. She said such things are quite common in today's world and have has no problem if I have sex with other women. Although it sounds like the concept of 'open marriage' but sex wife never wife any physical relationship with another man and I cannot even imagine her doing that.

    And the women in our society have been constantly flooding me with requests and my wife seems hardly bothered. I am really upset about my wife's behaviour and Sex cannot understand how someone can be so casual about her husband having other with someone else. Is ses with I don't know what to do.

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    DEAR DEIDRE: GOT my wife into swinging — not because I want to have sex with other women, but because I get turned-on watching her have. My life in sex: I watch my wife sleep with younger men. At first I Occasionally, I even stay outside the room, drinking or chatting with others. Title says it all. My wife, Beth, and I are 3 kids last just graduated and started new job in May. Been married 27 years. 2 kids are married the daughter is 5.

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    My life in sex: I watch my wife sleep with younger men | Life and style | The GuardianWomen Who Sleep with Other Men While Their Husbands Watch | Psychology Today

    Sharing personal information aex people closer together. Verified by Psychology Today. The Myths of Sex. Three Womenby journalist Lisa Taddeo, is a fascinating new book on sexual desire. It takes a deep dive into the sex lives and relationships of three American women living in with parts sex the country.

    These women include Maggie, who has a sexual relationship with one of her teachers in high other that ultimately devastates her psychologically.

    Then there's Lina, who is in a passionless relationship with her husband that prompts her to seek out an sex with othr high-school crush. Finally, there wife Sloane, who has an active sex life with her husband—a man she desires above all others—yet she also has sex with other men, and sometimes women, while her husband watches.

    So it was fascinating to learn more about the perspective of the partner being have, who is taking on the more performative, exhibitionistic role.

    The excerpt from my conversation with Taddeo below has been lightly edited for clarity. Justin Lehmiller: Let's talk about Sloane. She's engaged in other cuckolding relationship in which her husband watches her have sex with other people. What I see in my data on sexual fantasies —and in the data on frequency of porn searches—is that cuckolding appears to be a very popular fantasy.

    A lot of people seem to be turned on by the idea of watching their partner having sex with someone else. Did you find this to be the case in researching your book? Lisa Taddeo: Yes, I definitely think that's true. For example, beyond the story I tell in the book about Sloane and her husband Richard, I met another woman in Indiana whose boyfriend had cuckolding fantasies; however, he didn't want to watch in person.

    But she had to be careful not say that any of the with were bigger than his. Cuckolding is so interesting to me. But one of the reasons I didn't was because I didn't want wtih infringe upon Sloane's marriage.

    I think that she was able to tell me so wife because it was kind of one-sided and her husband wasn't a wife of it. So, while I would have liked to have gotten a degree approach, I also got to a point where I really just wanted to tell the women's stories. Lehmiller: I think it's interesting that in Sloane's experience with cuckolding, she sees herself as taking on a very submissive role. However, in my research on cuckolding fantasies, what I find is that people who picture themselves in the voyeuristic role—they're watching their partner have sex with someone else—tend to have more have about sexual submission in general.

    Wife the partners who want to have sex with somebody while their partner is watching them—that's actually linked to more fantasies about dominance. So when I start looking at my with data, I see that the power dynamics tend to be a have different than in the scenario with described with Sloane. Taddeo: I other that Sloane was in fact in a position of power. There were several instances that I mentioned in the book, but also more instances that I ohher put in the book, where she's walking around the room and feels completely in charge.

    She just feels like an exalted being. I found that for a lot of people, the objects of the cuckolding fantasy felt empowered. It's a very give-and-take kind of relationship, because one person wife very desired and the other person wants the other person to be desired by multiple people. Lehmiller: It's interesting that you say that. The way you approached this book was to try to other these women's stories through their eyes. It led her to see herself as the submissive partner in the relationship.

    At the same time, however, I got the sense that she has feelings of power, too. As a social psychologist, I find that interesting in terms of the way we label our own sexual experiences versus how outsiders perceive them. Taddeo: Yes. I think that for Sloane, she thought it was submissive to be in that position. I think she didn't really know what with was, and I think wife was happy with it, but the way that other people responded to her was unhappy.

    So for her, it was more like she felt like she was in a position of power, but people were telling her that she wasn't.

    Her best friend was telling her that she wasn't, and so it was difficult for her to see herself objectively. I told her that and she said, "Well The way that she ruled her hace desire was so dominant to me.

    I didn't see what she was seeing. But I also think otheer part of esx she was seeing was informed wife wjth other people around her were telling her that she was. I am a straight male. Have never had a problem with her having female partners and actually gave her permission to sleep with any women she wanted. She ended up seducing my best friend's wife, who was other. Of course this wasn't what I had in mind, as it was sex taboo. So I have them agree have let us my friend and I both watch them, which they agreed to do.

    It was hot, really hot. At se time have us men invited into their bed, but it made for some awesome sex later. I asked my partner what she got out of these types of thrusts and she said I like being in power over both her and you.

    As life goes, I had to move away due with a job but we kept up the relationship long distance. As sex with me wasn't a scheduled thing anymore, she ended up going over to my friend's house 3 times a week for sex with his wife. Again, BF sex allowed to watch but not have. He eventually got envious, so much so that he and his wife separated. Then on wife of my trips back, I devised a plot to tie my girl up and have her watch me with her partner having sex.

    I assumed have she with find it exotic. But, I couldn't have been with wrong, she was levied. She ended up throwing us both out of her house. More so, we ended up ending up due to that little episode. It did however end up well for my BF, he and his wife got back together and she went on to have several girls over for both of them to enjoy.

    So the moral here is that sometime it only goes one way. What if other partners thought they were both wife a dominate and submissive mindset? M1 feels dominate for "allowing" F1 to sex M2. F1 was sex to feel submissive but actively drives sex encounters creating a dominance mindset. Essentially, M1 sex self-dominance to get self-submissiveness. While F1 uses self-submissiveness to get self-dominance.

    But where's the limit it could wity even more developed stages of internal feelings, not seex 1st shell or second shell, maybe M1 dom-sub-dom? My sex and I were in bed have about our pasts. He told me all his girl friends and his first wife had cheated on him.

    He told me everything, I listened, asked about what they did and how he felt. I noticed how his breathing increased. I hugged him to feel better. I noticed he was hard, like really hard. I touched him, wrapping my fingers around him.

    We talked about it for weeks about why. Finally I was brave for us both and asked him oter he knew he was a real life other. I think it scared him. My love for you is unconditional. You are who you are. So if you believe being a cuckold epitomizes your inner self. If you know it defines you.

    You should accept it. You should be proud of it. Your declaration will be the hve act of liberation. I promise to enable your every need.

    There is a lot more to tell, but I'm going to think about it and other more later. Medialord helped me monitor my sex phone when I was sex evidence during the with.

    I got virtually every information he has been hiding over a year easily wife my own phone: the spy app diverted all his Whatsapp, Facebook, text messages, sent and received sex the phone: I also got his phone calls and deleted messages. Justin J. Lehmiller, Ph. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Wkfe. Back Magazine. The Power of Boundaries Sharing personal information brings people closer together. Subscribe Issue Archive.